update #18 - visiting the Motherland

"the ideal is to feel at home anywhere, everywhere" -- Geoff Dyer

Feeling at home anywhere, everywhere is something I've always longed for - and I feel is a lot of what prompted me to travel as much as I have. There was a desire within me to explore all these places and feel at home in them. To be easily adaptable. To embrace living cross-culturally, and to allow parts of those cultures to seep into who I am.

Stockholm, September 2016

That's why I wanted to stay longer than a week or two in each city or country I visited.
Why I wanted to stay with locals, eat like locals, live like locals.
Why I wanted to learn their language.
Why I wanted to learn their customs and culture.

And yet, no matter how much desire I've had to learn all those things and live like locals, I have rarely felt at home in all the places I've traveled. Some cultures are too different from my home culture. Some languages are too unlike those I've studied for me to even attempt to communicate. Some customs are too foreign for me to understand.

There can be a lot of barriers to not feeling at home in a foreign place, which is what makes it so amazing when you find a place in which you do finally feel at home.

Village walks in Dalarna

Despite the fact that I spent my first 18 years living in America, I struggled to feel at home in that culture. Part of that could be moving across the country when I was 8 years old. Even though the move was still within America, there are some vast cultural differences between Pennsylvania and Washington state. I might not have been aware of it at such a young age, but I definitely went through some serious culture shock after that move. I put all of my energy into resenting my new "home" and longing for my old one.

Throughout my teens, I had several opportunities to travel to countries in Europe and Latin America. I loved each visit. It was fun communicating in a different language and practicing that skill. Though I hadn't been raised in those countries, something felt right about those places - those cultures. I felt more at home there than I felt at home in Washington.

There's always time for fika in Sweden

More than anything, Sweden felt like home. I remember being there for the first time at 18 and thinking I'd never felt so at home since leaving Pennsylvania. I spent a year in that country, in the land of my forefathers, visiting the town of my people, and exploring a bit of the beautiful countryside. I fell in love and was determined to go back, no matter how long or what it took. There was something within me calling me "home," despite not having been born or raised in Sweden.

I continued to travel and seek opportunities to get me back to Europe, but it took nearly a decade before I was back in Sweden. Many adventures between then and now, including a move to Europe, have made it more and more clear that it is difficult to be at home anywhere and everywhere. Despite my desire for that to be true, it was not easy to feel just as at home in Uganda and Nicaragua as it had been in Sweden. Even moving to Spain has had its challenges for me. I've come to realize that Sweden is a land filled with people who share so many similar values, with whom I can easily relate (since they're a country filled with introverts ;) haha), and is a huge piece of my identity.

Visiting the family home in Dalarna

In the three years (off and on) that I've lived in Spain, I've been able to visit the Motherland 3 times, each with wonderfully unique experiences. This last visit (nearly 2 months ago now, oops) brought me so much joy and made it that much harder to leave. I spent a quick weekend up north of Stockholm, visiting some relatives and seeing places of great importance to our family history.
It was beautiful in so many ways. A refreshing taste of Fall weather. Laughter-filled connections with distant cousins. Peace and quiet in cozy homes with incredible views of Swedish landscapes & lakes.

Family history & fika time

I love that place, more than words can explain.
I love my family. I love that culture. I love the green beauty. I love that it SNOWS there. I love that the days are really short in the winter and extremely long in the summer.
I love those things because they are part of who I am. I can't explain it any other way. Sweden is my home, whether or not I ever get to live there again. The Swedes are my people.

I still love to travel and learn about new cultures. But maybe this idea of being at home anywhere and everywhere has more to do with taking with me the parts of Sweden that make it home. I live in Spain for now. Who knows what the next 5, 10, 20 years hold. But what I do know is what a gift it's been to have gotten so much time learning about and experiencing Swedish culture over the years. Those are the things I can take with me, wherever I go.

Saying goodbye on a gorgeous Fall day

At the top of Lake Siljan with the lady cousins

And so, with my dalahäst, I can be at home anywhere, everywhere. ;)

Family group shot outside the dalahäst factory

♥
mk

update #17 - resting

"sometimes the most urgent and vital thing you can possibly do is take a complete rest" -- Ashleigh Brilliant

Rest is a pretty important thing that I think we too often take for granted. It's so necessary, our bodies require several hours of rest every day in order to function properly. Imagine how much we're denying ourselves if we don't find a way to *properly* rest every year, month, or week.

Lake Constance, Germany

Living in Spain, I've come to realize that even something as basic and simple as rest is valued differently in each culture. In America, it seems to be "work as hard as you possibly can for as long as you possibly can so that you can rest later... maybe" while in many European countries, they take an entire month off work every hear to vacation with their families, close shop at least one day a week (usually Sunday) to rest, and even have shorter work weeks. And it turns out all these things make for more efficient employees who have happier lives. Crazy.

So why is it still hard for me to prioritize rest?

How can I be better about fitting rest into my weekly routines?

And what does rest actually look like?

German wildflowers

For some, rest may be as simple as having a few hours to themselves to read a book, listen to some music or a podcast, go for a hike, or even go shopping. For others, it may require a lot more planning and time off in a completely different setting. I think we actually need a little bit of both - taking time to rest every week and going on a vacation. Those vacation days are meant to be used. You don't want to deny them of their purpose, do you? ;)



So a couple of months ago, I knew I was in need of a more of a "vacation rest," which meant leaving Spain. Thankfully, there are a bunch of places I can get to on a dime because of budget airlines in Europe. I chose Germany because it was close enough that travel time wouldn't eat up most of my short 3-day trip, it was a language I didn't know so I could mentally zone out when I was in coffee shops, and one of my best friends happened to be studying abroad in Munich the same weekend I was looking at going. There was basically no reason not to go.

Here are some photos from the whirlwind (yet restful) trip:

View right outside the Sbahn station - Marienplatz

Reunited after over a year!!

Munich mimosas with the best!

Taking a peaceful walk along Lake Constance

Exploring Memmingen, Germany

On this trip, rest looked like a lot of different things: getting some quality time with Laura, exploring some new places, having some quiet time to myself spent reading, and being out in nature that was GREEN.

When it was all said and done, I wished I could have stayed longer. Even just one or two more days would have been nice. But I did come back feeling pretty refreshed, which was the purpose of the trip. And so I think I will be a little more intentional about seeking out times of rest - whatever they might look like - on a more regular basis.

There will (nearly) always be work to do, but shouldn't have to go through life running on fumes. We should enjoy every aspect of life - both work and rest - and that requires a balance of the two.

So, rest up.
Go adventure. Try something new. Go for a hike. Read a book. Explore a new place.
Do something good for your body and soul.




♥
mk

update #16 - time

"learn to appreciate what you have before time makes you appreciate what you had" -- Ziad K. Abdelnour

It's now been almost 8 months since I arrived in Spain. In some ways it's hard to believe it's already been that long, but at the same time it feels like I said goodbye to family & friends ages ago.

Time is a funny thing.
One minute, everything is brand new - sights, smells, food, people - and before you know it, those things have all become familiar, second-nature, and it's sad to think about leaving.

Noche en Blanco (Málaga) with some great friends

Thankfully I'm not the one leaving this time, but some of the friends I've made in the last 8 months will be leaving over the next few months and it's sad to think they won't be part of my daily or weekly rhythms of life anymore.
Sure, there's Skype and WhatsApp and email and countless forms of technology that help people stay in touch from the other side of the world. But we all know it's not the same.

Spending time with my adorable new friends

I've tried to live in the moment, appreciating each day I'm here, every interaction and conversation, all the bits and pieces of life that make up a culture. And yet, without realizing it, time slips by.

It comes and goes on its own.

It's a beautiful gift that we often take for granted.

It's something we can't control.

All we can do, really, is make the most of what's in front of us:

The people in our lives right now.

The places we are.

The experiences we can choose to have.

A quick day trip to Granada came with this stellar view

We can be fully present to what's happening now and make some new memories, share in the laughter and love of good friendships, and soak up the sunshine life is offering us.

So go forth, and enjoy today.

♥
mk

update #15 - travel: Barcelona & Girona

"travel, in the younger sort, is a part of education; in the elder, a part of the experience" -- Francis Bacon

Wine & tapas in Barcelona

Travel does wonders for the soul. It doesn't have to be far. But going somewhere that's outside of your daily (or weekly) "normal" gives a refreshing perspective. 


It has helped me appreciate the many things I have here at home - community, familiarity, routine, constant sunshine (even though I'd be fine with some change in the weather every now and then ;) haha) - while satisfying my desire for adventure, change, exploration, learning something new.

Finally got to see Ally IN SPAIN!

A couple of weeks ago, I got to spend a weekend up in Barcelona, visiting a few friends, seeing a bunch of sights, relaxing, enjoying some good wine, exploring the city - and even going up to Girona for a day. It was a wonderful weekend away, a nice change of pace, a breath of fresh air, and a fun adventure!

Sagrada Familia

Exploring Parc Guell - Gaudi's house!

With just 62 hours in the area, we made the most of our time: going to the Sagrada Familia, getting a 2.5-hour (FREE!) walking tour of the Gothic Quarter, hiking up to Parc Guell (where Gaudi's house and quite a bit of his other works are), walking Las Ramblas, and even taking time to relax and enjoy some wine and tapas. 

It was an ideal time of year to go - not quite peak tourist season yet, so there weren't too many people, and the weather was great (aside from the rain our first day there)! If you have the chance to go to Barcelona, I'd definitely recommend going in late Spring or early Fall if you can. :)

Sitting outside my new favorite cafe

Our last day in Barcelona, we decided to take a 40-minute train ride north to Girona. We walked the old city wall (which provided amazing views, including the one in the photo below), went to the cathedral but had just barely missed the cutoff for the free entry, so we decided to go to a cafe my friend had recommended (La Fabrica) and fell in love with the city a little more. The cafe is in this tiny little plaza between several buildings and at the base of some ancient stairs; it was surreal and awesome all at once. The best part of Girona: everything in the old part of town is walkable from the train station! I would highly recommend taking a day to go explore Girona if you ever find yourself in Catalunya.

View of Girona from the old city wall

There will probably always be a thousand reasons not to travel

- even for a quick weekend trip -

but it's completely worth it. Vale la pena! 

Take advantage of flight deals,

find a cheap train ticket,

plan a short road trip with someone...

go on an adventure.

Your soul will thank you.

♥ mk

update #14 - seasons

"everyone must take time to sit and watch the leaves turn" -- elizabeth lawrence

Snow in Stockholm

Living in Málaga, I often miss the winter. I love snow sports, looking outside and watching the ground get covered in a blanket of white, seeing snow-capped mountain tops, sipping hot chocolate by a warm fire after a walk through the snowy woods... There's so much magic in that season.

I do also love the summer. And here, I get plenty of that. It's not sunny and hot all the time, but the weather is pretty pleasant for most of the year here.

So maybe what I truly miss is the change in seasons. Having spent 10 years of my childhood in Seattle, you'd think I would be used to the lack of change. But that is one of the things that led me to travel and explore other places. I wanted change. I wanted something different, something new.

How often do we find ourselves wanting change? It seems so prevalent in society today - we need new phones every 2 years, new clothes every season, new haircuts, new cars, new jobs, new apartments, new whatever. Are we so unable to be satisfied or content with all that we have?

Yes, it's good to have motivation to push yourself and grow, but at what cost? If we're always thinking about the next new thing, the next goal on our list, are we ever being present and enjoying the moment?

I'm here in Spain for a season. There are no certainties of how long this season will last - months, years, decades? But I might as well enjoy the summer while I'm here, instead of longing for winter.

A sunny "winter" day in my neighborhood

I can embrace this season, seeing the gift of each day, every conversation, each friendship that's forming...

So, rather than dwelling on what I don't have or what I'm missing, I choose to make the most of this season of my life. I know I'll miss it when it's over, so I might as well enjoy it while I'm in it.
 

A Málaga sunset

♥ mk

update #13 - stories

"I am interested in personal stories because that's when people become expressive, spontaneous, and heartfelt." -- Anna Deavere Smith

I stopped on the corner of the street and asked my friend how he was doing. He's someone my co-worker and I first met while serving lunch at Amfremar (the local soup kitchen in our neighborhood) and have since gotten to know at our English club. He's been looking for work since the end of the summer. Without any family nearby, he has been forced to find alternative housing (read: living in a tent in the foothills just above our neighborhood). He makes a valiant effort, though, dressing in nice, button-up shirts during the day and selling birds of paradise flowers on the side of the street to make ends meet.

Every time I see him, I stop to say hello and ask how he's doing. He's quite a positive person, given his circumstances, which often reminds me of what's truly important in life.

It's not so much about the things we have (beyond our basic needs), but the relationships we have - and how we can share the things we do have with other people in our lives.
It's not about noticing what we have (or lack) compared to other people, but more about coming together as a community and realizing what we all have together.

It's a joy to be able to work in community development because most of my weeks are filled with stories like this that make me pause, re-focus, and re-center on what matters most. I honestly believe that if each of us opened our eyes to see the people we pass on the streets every day and took a moment to listen to their stories, we'd all have weeks filled with encounters and stories to shift our perspectives back to people, relationships, and community.

Who can you talk to this week?

There's a chance it could make their day.
And an even greater chance it could have a lasting impact on your heart.




♥ mk

update #12 - perspective

“To my mind, the greatest reward and luxury of travel is to be able to experience everyday things as if for the first time, to be in a position in which almost nothing is so familiar it is taken for granted.” – Bill Bryson

In the last five weeks, I've spent the night in 6 different cities spread out between three countries on two continents.

I'm back to living out of a suitcase.

Enjoying the snow in Sweden

It's difficult to feel settled when constantly traveling. And even more difficult when the place where I want to feel settled isn't my home culture. I'm still adjusting to life in Spain. Then I go and explore Sweden (which was just wonderful) and come back to Spain for a week and a half and then jump on a plane to Morocco for a coaching training.

Three drastically different cultures. All within two weeks.

Visiting the souk in Casablanca

I think I'm just now recovered from all that travel and have registered that I'm actually back in Spain and here to stay for the foreseeable future. And you know what's amazing? All that travel, despite the fact that I was living out of a suitcase and constantly on the go, ended up helping me feel more settled here. 

Spain feels more like home to me now. My piso is a restful place that I come to take a break in the middle of my long days meeting with people, volunteering, and helping run our English club. I'm recognizing more and more of the faces I see in my neighborhood. My teammates are my extended family. I look forward to going to the soup kitchen and serving my (homeless) neighbors I often see on the streets selling flowers or asking for spare change. I'm excited to build relationships with the people in my neighborhood, investing in them as leaders, entrepreneurs, community members, and global citizens.

Maybe this feeling of being settled would have come eventually without all the travel this past month. But I'm grateful I got the best of both worlds - visiting one of my favorite places, exploring new cultures, and then coming back "home." 

Sunset on the Mediterranean

There is still some unfamiliarity to this life in Spain, but it's becoming more and more comfortable. And despite the frustrations that are part of adjusting to a new culture, I'm happy to be right where I am.

♥ mk